not embarrassing--I find myself ALWAYS writing about instagram/the internet, even when I don't want to, because there's so much to untangle. It has also made me both happy and unhappy. my internet self and my spiritual Self get confused by each other. Having so much access to people cannotttt be healthy, but if you didn't have access to M's profile, how would you have found out about their history?? I guess you would have had to wait to find out in some irl way. maybe the devastation would have been the same. i always like when people are honest about instagram because then I can hold their personal internal experience against my own personal internal experience of observing them. i get wanting to deactivate ig because of so much scrolling, but it's interesting to hear the anxiety part, too. when i see you on instagram, i receive you like this: funny, ironic, artistic (not just in vibe: actually doing something about it, actually artistically engaged), politically active, and passionate. i hope it's not too horribly intense to be ~perceived~ rn lol. but what i'm saying is from the outside, there is nothing at all to feel bad about yourself for. maybe i'm saying this rn because i need to remind myself too. i can waste so much time assuming that others are perceiving me in the worst way when i think probably most of them aren't. anyway. thank you for the online history. i am not sure what this says about me, but i think the most insane part of this whole piece is that you once had a computer in the kitchen.
Thank you!! It helps to know that someone I respect perceives me positively on IG and not as a nightmare!! There’s so much self-consciousness around being online that feels new, I think it might be related to social justice causes, like we’re very concerned about signaling the right things to the right ppl and being perceived as good and I think that bleeds into all aspects of our internet selves, just this profound self-consciousness!!
I’ve found out about men lying from social media stalking so many times and I’m not sure how else I would have found out…. It’s a necessary evil???
not embarrassing--I find myself ALWAYS writing about instagram/the internet, even when I don't want to, because there's so much to untangle. It has also made me both happy and unhappy. my internet self and my spiritual Self get confused by each other. Having so much access to people cannotttt be healthy, but if you didn't have access to M's profile, how would you have found out about their history?? I guess you would have had to wait to find out in some irl way. maybe the devastation would have been the same. i always like when people are honest about instagram because then I can hold their personal internal experience against my own personal internal experience of observing them. i get wanting to deactivate ig because of so much scrolling, but it's interesting to hear the anxiety part, too. when i see you on instagram, i receive you like this: funny, ironic, artistic (not just in vibe: actually doing something about it, actually artistically engaged), politically active, and passionate. i hope it's not too horribly intense to be ~perceived~ rn lol. but what i'm saying is from the outside, there is nothing at all to feel bad about yourself for. maybe i'm saying this rn because i need to remind myself too. i can waste so much time assuming that others are perceiving me in the worst way when i think probably most of them aren't. anyway. thank you for the online history. i am not sure what this says about me, but i think the most insane part of this whole piece is that you once had a computer in the kitchen.
Thank you!! It helps to know that someone I respect perceives me positively on IG and not as a nightmare!! There’s so much self-consciousness around being online that feels new, I think it might be related to social justice causes, like we’re very concerned about signaling the right things to the right ppl and being perceived as good and I think that bleeds into all aspects of our internet selves, just this profound self-consciousness!!
I’ve found out about men lying from social media stalking so many times and I’m not sure how else I would have found out…. It’s a necessary evil???